Angel was showing me she loved me, in her way, a thousand times a day. I just was not paying attention. I was grumbling and feeling sorry for myself when all the while I had exactly what I was grumbling about. I have done that before with God too and I suspect I am not the only one so I wanted to share this story.
Awhile back I had been working a TON and was very distracted at home. I started to feel guilty that Angel wasn't getting enough attention.
So of course, what does the devil do with that little crack of worry and guilt that I left open for him? He kicks the door wide open, invites himself in and has a field day in my mind. What was initially a couple passing thoughts and brief worries started to turn into a week of occasion after occasion where I was looking for behavior to justify my fear.
I noticed (or I felt like I was noticing) that Angel didn't want to snuggle on my lap like she used to. She seemed to want to be on the floor and not curled up on my lap with a blanket. "THAT'S IT!" I told my myself. I am the worst dog mom ever. I have not been giving her enough attention, she resents me and now wants nothing to do with me. I.HAVE.RUINED.EVERYTHING. Cue the self-pity party.
GOD STEPS IN
Then one day I decided to take a break, read some Scripture and meditate. Best decision I could have made. While I was sitting there enjoying quiet time with the Lord He opened my mind to show me how foolish I was being with Angel. Of course she didn't want to curl up in my lap with her blanket, it had been 95-100 degrees for weeks! Geez. What was wrong with me! Then He slowly began to remind me of all the ways Angel actually is showing me that she loves me. And not just loves me, but is super-glued at the hip to me.
I looked down and she was curled up, sound asleep at my feet. We live in a sweet cozy, one room cabin. Angel can see me from anywhere in the place. She doesn't need to get up and follow me down a hall or into another room. But if I were to get up and go sit at the table to work, Angel would wake up and go curl up under the table on my feet.
When I am in the kitchen cooking (again, only a few feet from the table) Angel has to be curled up between the refrigerator and the trash can. That is her assigned spot (which she assigned herself!)
If I walk across the cabin to go plug my phone in to charge on the nightstand Angel will wake up from a dead sleep, come flying across the room and start tap dancing. She thinks I am getting into bed and she doesn't want to be left out. In fact, if it is past a certain time at night and I have not gone to bed yet she will come over to me and tap her paws, snort and walk in circles until I put my book down, pick her up and tuck her into bed with me.
And let's not even talk about the bathroom. Why I need a little furry Shih Tzu body guard with wobbly legs to protect me from the bathroom monsters, I will never know. But she cannot let me go into the bathroom alone.
She can't fall asleep at night without being pressed up right against my leg and in the morning she crawls up onto my chest and paws at me until I wake up and pay attention to her.
If my shoes are on my feet or my keys are in my hand Angel is already at the door waiting for me, insisting that she be allowed to accompany me where ever I am going.
But no, no she does't love me any more and is tired of me. I felt so foolish for the way I had been feeling the past week.
Angel was showing me she loved me, in her way, a thousand times a day. I just was not paying attention. I had put one thing in my mind as to how she should show me she loved me and when I didn't see that, I started to feel worried and guilty. I was grumbling and feeling sorry for myself when all the while I had exactly what I was grumbling about.
I have done that before with God too and I suspect I am not the only one so I wanted to share this story.
HOW DOES GOD SAY "I LOVE YOU" IN YOUR LIFE
God shows me in so many ways that He loves me, He hears me and He is right by my side. But so often I will get something in my mind as to how I think He should be showing up in my life, how I think He should be demonstrating His love for me that I ignore, overlook and disregard all His daily acts of loving kindness and provision.
A thousand different ways. A thousand little things. Something that may mean the world to you may not mean much to someone else. But God knows us so well, He knows exactly which little things are special to you and which are special to me.
"...but they did not realize it was I who healed them. I led them with cords of human kindness, with ties of love. To them I was like one who lifts a little child to the cheek, and I bent down to feed them." Hosea 11:3-4
So I encourage you to take some time this week and ask God to open your eyes to all the little ways He is loving you, providing for you and demonstrating His presence in your life. You just might be surprised at how loved you really are.